Often, we are only happy when good things happen to us, but when our neighbor is rejoicing over something good that happened to them..deep inside we don't really care much. We're probably having a pity party because it is not happening to us. Most of us (myself first on that list) aren't even good at listening, we just desire our voice to be expressed and heard. There are numerous examples like these. Bottom line is, we are self-focused and ridiculous.
I'm tired of me. I don't want to pretend. I want it to be real. I want to love people with a genuine love. I want to care deeply, to really listen and try to understand them. I want to have a heart that cares for others. I want to find joy in helping others, have delight in their blessings, find happiness in the good things that happen to them, hurt for them when they have pain or trouble. You've probably noticed the reiteration with "I want". But the emphasis on want is supposed to be a sure indication, that I have yet to obtain these beautiful characteristics, and can only sigh in desperation knowing I lack them all. Surely acquiring these things will banish selfishness, evil motives, apathy, envy and all the other sins that bring misery. Wishful thinking and impossible come to mind when I think of ever becoming this person, especially knowing me..but with God all things are possible.
I want to learn real love.
But I am so selfish, help me.
I can only look to Jesus Christ's example and be in awe.